As singles waiting on God for a spouse is often the hardest season. It’s not meant to be the hardest. However, we make it. Why? Because the flesh does not want to be alone. What you don’t realize is your spirit man desires to grow closer to Jesus. You get so caught up in the lives of others who are getting married or starting a family. For many getting up there in age, you have to deal with society or your family constantly reminding you, “your clock is ticking.” When are you getting married? Society treats being “single,” like its a curse. But let me remind you of what Apostle Paul says in 1 Corinthian 7:8-9 “So I say to those who aren’t married and to widows—it’s better to stay unmarried, just as I am. But if they can’t control themselves, they should go ahead and marry. It’s better to marry than to burn with lust.”Furthermore, any marriage based on fulfilling a sexual desire will never last.Click To Tweet
Don’t get me wrong; I am not saying you need to stay single forever. I’m saying stop desiring to get married to fill a void of loneliness, to please others or to have a warm body next to you at night it’s a recipe for disaster. Marriage is not built on intimacy. Furthermore, any marriage based on fulfilling a sexual desire will never last. The Lord has taught me this is supposed to be my best season. It’s a season of pruning and throwing away the old you. Getting rid of the excess baggage, you picked up along the way from past relationships, childhood insecurities, and selfishness. In fact, many who enter into a marriage without being completely pruned and delivered from certain habits find themselves fighting each other or running away from their union. They weren’t prepared. So if you are currently single and waiting on God, consider it a privilege, God has spared you the heartache and working on you now. You have an opportunity to know Jesus on an intimate level with no distractions; no one is competing for your attention but Jesus. Therefore, your eyes should be on Him, the author, and finisher of your faith.
Friend, I know it’s hard but I’m getting to know Jesus more and falling in love with Him on a personal level. Can I tell you how sweet and peaceful it feels? No drama, I don’t have to wonder where He is or who He’s with because He is always with me. Oh, why didn’t you text me back right away? I can be myself around Him. He knows me better than I know myself. Lately, I’ve been getting in my spirit the Lord wants me to spend more time with Him. And to confirm it’s not emotions or my mind the Lord used someone to tell me He wants me to worship Him more. I’ve learned when God desires to get a message to you He will use those around you who are in Christ. Especially if you are not sure if it’s Him. It’s what believers called confirmation. Where the Holy Spirit revealed something to you personally, then He will use others to confirm what He said to you.
So yesterday I started “date day.” I woke up and went to an early morning prayer service at church. I went to Target, the nail salon and came home. I did it all with Jesus on my mind. I walked and talked to Him. On my way home, I was talking to Him about the blog and what I should write as my second post. As I was getting ready to wash my hair (which is pretty much a process, all my natural sisters out there know what I mean), I heard “date day with Jesus.” When I woke up yesterday morning, it wasn’t my intention to call it “date day with Jesus.” But at that very moment, it was birthed in my spirit and I understood the Lord loud and clear. What is “date day with Jesus?” It’s being intentional about spending time with Him. It’s being intentional about getting to know Him. You’re not ignoring Him. You talk to Him and invite Him to come along with you wherever you go. Even though He is always present, we don’t always acknowledge Him in everything we do. Which many can attest to. You have to be intentional about Him. Single sisters date Jesus. The same way you would feel about dating a guy. You want the same feeling with Him. In the past, when I met a guy for the first time, I can’t stop thinking about him. I want to spend as much time getting to know him. So I want this feeling with Jesus and you should desire it as well.
I hear a lot of married couples having “date day or night” once a week to spend time with each other. I think it’s great. But I can’t help but think about singles who barely even spend time getting to know Jesus yet want to be married. If you can’t intentionally spend time with Jesus who you don’t see how will you intentionally spend the rest of your life with ONE person (let me put some emphasis on it but the SAME person). The only time many remember Him is in times of trouble. Let’s be honest if you are dating a guy/girl and he/she barely call/text or even bother to check on you. How would it make you feel? Not good right? Well, think about how Jesus feels when you go about your life, not even acknowledging Him. No “thank you for waking me up this morning Lord,” I know you didn’t have to or thank you for my paycheck this week,” and the list goes on. But here you are complaining about waiting for a spouse. There is so much He would like to reveal to you about your purpose and future. But He can’t do it because He can’t trust you. Would you share your secrets with someone who rarely calls you or take the time to get to know you?
I’ve been saved for six years, and I desire to go deeper with the Lord. I want a closer walk with the Holy Spirit. I have not been intentional throughout my walk with the Lord. I think I have been rather selfish in my walk. I was this spoiled brat acting like God owed me something especially since I accepted Him. I was wrong, God does not owe me a thing. I need Him more than He needs me. This year I grew a lot spiritually. I did not pray as much this year. I think all my prayers for the last five years was stored up in heaven in a bottle somewhere. I did more worshipping and reading the word. It’s like God was just waiting for me to start pursuing Him and not what He can do for me. As a result, He has done wonders in my life this year. He began to reveal my purpose to me. I still need Him to make it clearer to me, but I have an idea now. So I’m intentionally choosing to pursue Him now more than ever.The pressure to succeed or keep riches is REAL. Click To Tweet
Friend, for you to live extraordinary lives here on earth, you need this relationship. For you to truly stand out and be the light you were created to be, you have to allow God to have His way in you. Yes, one can be successful on their own, but it will be hard to maintain it. There are plenty “self-made” people out here suffering in silence, taking pill after pill to sleep at night or to calm their nerves. Have you ever wondered why so many famous and wealthy people find themselves addicted to drugs, alcohol, or worst committing suicide? The pressure to succeed or keep riches is REAL. The pressure to live is real. Plus they don’t have to be rich, nonbelievers who don’t know Jesus experience the same pressure. Before I got saved, I was there. Hennessy was my favorite drink to pre-game in college. I just wanted to be numb to all my problems. When alcohol could no longer do it for me, I almost tapped out of life. Life was way too much for me, and I could no longer rely on my strength. But thank God for Jesus I no longer have to drink to numb anything!
Last week, my pastor preached on “partnering with the Holy Spirit for an effective lifestyle.” She talked about “how we should rely on the Holy Spirit to help us make decisions. And when we partner with the Holy Spirit we can expect results.” But why? Because you no longer rely on your own understanding. He is leading you and directing you where to go. He can lead you to where He has the right job for you. The bank that will provide the loan for the business or dream house. He can lead the right spouse to you. It’s hard to get this type of guidance if you take Him out of the equation. Many will preach and talk about God but never mention the Holy Ghost. The Holy Spirit is important when you desire to develop a relationship with God. Jesus promised us a Comforter in John 14:26 “But when the Father sends the Advocate as my representative—that is, the Holy Spirit—he will teach you everything and will remind you of everything I have told you.”
Friend, you need the Holy Spirit to guide you in truth. He enables you to do the will of God and for it to manifest in your life. So it’s important to “date Jesus,” and to have a relationship with the Holy Spirit. You need God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit to sustain you on this earth. Three persons but one God! They are all one. You can’t go to one without acknowledging the other. To you who might be wondering “why can’t I hear from God?”, “where is my spouse God?” or “Why am I stressed, depressed and oppressed?” It might be a good idea to date Jesus. Get to know Him so He can reveal more of Himself to you. Cast all your cares on Him because He cares for you. David said in Psalm 55:22 “Cast your cares on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken.”
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Until next time God bless you richly for reading.